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Mistress Marilyn's POV
No shit, Tempus Fugit!
What's my problem? 
8th-Sep-2009 01:13 pm
3:10-dime-novel
So, I've been trying to understand what my 'blogger's block' is about. It's like I can't stand even loading LiveJournal (which is not easy task today, btw). I've been like a social hermit all summer, doing nothing but work, drive to the beach and play computer games.

I actually finished my sequel to 'Stubborn' and posted it a few days ago, and I started Part 3! And now I need to clean out some things in this journal and re-do my profile . . .

Watching Andy Murray unravel at the US Open today seems vaguely familiar to me. It's like I've had the same mental meltdown, but I don't have to do it in front of thousands of people.

It's not that I don't have anything to say. I have LOTS to say. I think about saying it. But I don't do it. I've practiced avoidance, when I really wanted to start a new community and get deep into fanfic writing again.

So today when I was looking at my profile, I noticed that batfic100 had been deleted. Deleted! The community where I spent so much time playing a year ago, a community with so many really wonderful drabbles from batfans. Thank goodness I loaded all mine up to a drabble journal, anticipating something like this might happen. Yeesh. If someone wants to let their community go, at least leave it up so people can still read the stories. Yes, I've let many groups and communities go dormant. But I haven't zapped them out of existence. It makes it so hard to want to post to a community where you don't know or trust the maintainer.

'Nuff said. I'm off to the shower! (Just like Murray soon will be.)

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Comments 
8th-Sep-2009 08:57 pm (UTC)

I hope you can get back into the swing of things here,Marilyn,and post at least every now and then. Both you and Charlie are such excellent writers and I love reading your thoughts and about all of the fun things you do! :)

Isn't it interesting how I seem to be able to blather on and on in my journal and yet can't "find the time" to write fics or anything else while you are quite the opposite (at least at the moment)? I need to find the time though,because I am home by myself during the day now with the kids back in school,and NaNo is once again right around the corner!

That's too bad about the fanfic community,and you're right: the maintainers should have kept it open for others to continue to read and enjoy. I hope everyone else was as clever as you and backed up all of their fics! Perhaps the maintainers gave everyone the opportunity to do so before they shut down operations...

I hope you're having a good day,Marilyn! ♥

P.S. Did you notice once again I blathered on? *LOL*
9th-Sep-2009 05:01 am (UTC)
Thanks, Deanna! I hope so, too. I think it would be funny if fanfic got me back into LJ, since it's what got me on line in the first place.

Blather on, my dear! I always appreciate it.
8th-Sep-2009 11:52 pm (UTC)
positive reinforcement! NICE TO SEE YOU!!!

love
t


9th-Sep-2009 05:01 am (UTC)
Thanks, dear!
9th-Sep-2009 03:27 am (UTC)
I know exactly what you mean about "blogger's block". I've been suffering from it too. Maybe it's an Aries-thing.

I've been writing fic, too, just slow to finish. Even with a month to post fics, I haven't had one make it out of re-writes.

Sorry to hear about your batfic community. Glad to know you took precautions, though.

I hope you're able to break through your block soon.



Edited at 2009-09-09 03:27 am (UTC)
9th-Sep-2009 05:03 am (UTC)
Hmm . . . maybe it IS an Aries thing. We're so mercurial sometimes.

I need some deadlines for fanfic. They usually help me. But it's enough to keep up with our monthly writing group where we do REAL stuff. It's hard to believe I've written more non-fandom-related fiction than fanfic this year!

Anyway, I'm working on it. All it takes is sitting down and doing it!

(By the way, I LOVE your icon 'One Knight Stand.' I just saw it again in my messages.)
9th-Sep-2009 05:34 am (UTC)
"Sitting down and doing it." Yup, I think that's the ticket. After three years in this apartment I finally cleared out and cleaned up the spare room. I can actually walk around in it! Now I'm going to use it as my office/studio/writing space.

I love that icon too! It's one of isabel77's masterpieces!

Edited at 2009-09-09 05:38 am (UTC)
9th-Sep-2009 07:03 pm (UTC)
OMG, I'm trying to clean up some stuff, too. I went through all my 'keepsakes' stored in the bottom of my wardrobe, and I got rid of tons of stuff that's been sitting around the closet area of my bedroom since I was hunting for something several months ago. Now I need to continue to clean up my closet. I got these new hangers off HSN, so I need to re-hang a quarter of my clothes, hehe. And yesterday I started cleaning my bathroom, just because it seemed like a good thing to do.

Wow. Life is hard.

You'll LOVE having your own office to write in. The office Charlie and I share is so crowded and so disorganized, but at least we have it.
9th-Sep-2009 04:09 am (UTC)
I always love having you here at LJ -- but no pressure! (You've got enough of that in your life as it is...)

I ADORE "Stubborn," by the way and can't wait for the next chapter!

The thing with batfic100 is MADDENING. I really didn't like that moderator -- clearly with GOOD REASON. She just DUMPS an active community? WHY??? But you could always make your OWN version of it now, I guess...

In the long run, it's all good!
9th-Sep-2009 05:06 am (UTC)
Actually, someone else DID make a new Batman drabble community, but it never took off. Let's face it, a year ago the Dark Knight fandom was EVERYWHERE here at LJ. But all the kids who got into it have moved on to other stuff.

And I'm pretty much moved on myself . . . although not entirely.

Yes, pressure is constant. I don't want to end up the Melvin Purvis of LiveJournal, 25 years later regretting that I resigned.
9th-Sep-2009 06:32 am (UTC)
Maybe it was necessary to take some time away, but I am so glad that you are back! Begone Blogger's Block!

So horrible about that comm, better abandoned than deleted...maybe I am exagerating but it really hurts me to see deleted journals and comms, I dunno.

Looking forward to the conclusion of "Stubborn". :)
9th-Sep-2009 07:07 pm (UTC)
I agree. I hate to see the deletions, but I don't clean them off my profile page like some people do. I like to remember them somehow. I was just SHOCKED when I saw the line through batfic100.

I wrote a page on 'Stubborn' when we were sitting at Starbucks the other day, but I decided it's a bunch of wasted stuff that I could put in another story. I want to finish up, so I need my 3,000 words to count, to get Dan and Ben (and William) to wherever it is they're going.
9th-Sep-2009 04:10 pm (UTC)
Consider that you just broke your lj writer's block by talking about it. You are now a free woman, lol. You have more to say than I do girl. And you can say it however you want, a little piece here and there.

From what I can gather by reading Charlie's journal you have been very active in your life, working and playing, so I think you've been living your life pretty well.
9th-Sep-2009 07:13 pm (UTC)
Yeah, you're right. But I thought I'd broken it back in July, and I hadn't done it. I'm hoping this will stick. Maybe if I get our 'Public Enemies' community started, it will give me incentive.

Yeah, I guess we've been pretty active, playing a lot, when we're not working, that is. It's certainly been a nice, relaxing summer in many ways. But it's also been frustrating for me in others, that I'm not myself, that I'm not motivated to write or blog or work out, that I'm tired most of the time. In fact, I'm planning on going to the doctor and having my thyroid tested, just to see if there's not an issue.
9th-Sep-2009 08:37 pm (UTC)
I think going to see your doctor is the first thing to do. You have to make sure there's not a medical problem at the root of things, and after that you might have a better idea of what's going on.

I have low places where I feel apathetic and just like something very heavy rolled over me and flattened me out. At those times I could scream or take a nap.
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