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Mistress Marilyn's POV
No shit, Tempus Fugit!
Writer's Block: Personality goes a long way 
5th-Sep-2010 10:37 am
girl from
Have you ever been the target of cyber-bullying? What was your reaction?

Oh, hell yes. I've been flamed, de-famed and stalked, all in the name of 'fandom.' There were outrageous things said about me, either behind my back or to my internet face. Five years ago it made me shaky and paranoid. Now I just shrug. But I still have a hard time trusting, and I figure there were some real people out there I didn't believe because of the others.

The anonymity of the internet brings out the worst in people. You have to be smart and you have to be careful. But most of all you need a thick skin.

For me it's been a reminder of what I learned as a little kid: "Sticks and stones can break my bones, but words can never hurt me."

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5th-Sep-2010 05:49 pm (UTC)
As hurtful as the experience was (and it was very hurtful), I'm glad it all happened. We were both naive and far too trusting before that -- and we learned a lot about the nasty side of the cyber world. (And how evil people can be.)

We got a valuable education, and I'm grateful for that!

It was weird to have people say I didn't exist, though -- and that I was just a sockpuppet (yeah, I know what that means now, thanks to all the crap) you created! Right, folks.

It was illuminating to discover just how much free time many people have. I can't begin to imagine it! Don't they ever have to WORK??? (Clearly not.)
5th-Sep-2010 06:03 pm (UTC)
I see it as two huge incidents separated by a little time but probably propagated by the same person or persons. And that person is a brilliant manipulator with a real gift of recognizing the weaknesses in people around her.

I feel bad that the whole thing drove away a lot of folks I thought were friends, either out of mistrust or disgust. And I'm sorry that several fandoms were pretty much ruined for me because of it.

But otherwise, yes, I'm glad it happened. I learned a lot.

One of the things I learned was *not* to trust in any fandom. There are trolls and immature moderators in every fandom. You can enjoy a community, but don't expect it to last. Put fanfic someplace you can control it. And don't get too chummy with anybody who's ultimately unwilling to share his or her real identify.

Allow me to quote my favorite line from Dracula (try to imagine the heavy Cockney accent): They're crazy. They're all crazy except for me and you . . . And I have me doubts about you.
7th-Sep-2010 09:43 pm (UTC)
It seems like a terrible thing to go through, but I have to say that you always take stuff with the right attitude. :)
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